Friday, July 07, 2006


Not enough has been made of Love. Pure, unadulterated, all-pervasive, unconditional…love. Can there ever be enough love?

Every time a new baby enters this world, it is a fleshy reminder of all the hope and possibility, the potential of unbridled undefined unrestricted love. Love that gushes forth so strongly and so innately, it can't help itself. It is automatic. It just is.

Love that encircles a mother's heart and being, forever changing her into more than she thought was possible. Love that shows the way to healing the past by loving the present while opening to the future.

Love so strong it encompasses hate, it encompasses fear, it encompasses detachment and conflict and violence. Love that is so solid, even its own solidity becomes permeable, and vaporizes.

Can we ever tire of hearing about love? Do we ever get to a point where we no longer need to learn about it, we're too old, too wise? Where we no longer need to be reminded that we are born of love, that we are loved, that we are in fact, love itself? Even if we can't see or feel it? Not just a few but every single one of us?

I am reminded of this when my daughter has trouble closing her eyes at night. She says she is afraid and can't do it. She says she needs me as she reaches for any piece of my body to hold. I am reminded again the next morning when she is having difficulty transitioning to camp. For what is it about separation, change that is so scary? Or the feeling of being disconnected (at least temporarily) so threatening?

I am reminded of my own struggles with courage and the need to be validated in what I do. Shouldn't it be assumed, automatic, this feeling of self-acceptance and self-worth by now? At a certain point in life, shouldn't I just feel fully capable, and love myself enough to make good choices, to trust myself and my actions? I still need to be reminded to love myself. To connect to absolute love. To go higher. There is always more.

I think of the body that has accompanied me all this way. We are still here. We are still going for it, my body and I. I think of the softness of my belly and thank it for the life it has brought and attempted to bring forth. I think of my generous behind and thank it for padding my many falls. I thank my shoulders and arms for being strong enough to carry my burdens and loved ones. I thank my legs for their endurance on a path I can't always see. I thank my mind for its ability to survive, to adapt, to recreate. I think of my heart, shattered and broken and mended with scotch tape and crazy glue. It stills beats, it still feels, it still loves, it still swells. I thank it for staying with me through this journey, and continuing to stay open and connected to the one consciousness. Love heals. Love endures.

Love is the trail of blood that connects us all. Blood lines. Family ties. Blood that signals a woman's ability to hold life in her body. Blood that surges from placenta to embryo. Blood that transforms into mother's milk to nourish our young. Blood that rinses a wound until it is clean. Blood that pumps through the heart that keeps us living. Blood that unites a people, a cause. Blood that spills on a nation, as we fight for our property lines. Blood that sacrifices the young for our rights and beliefs. Blood that is shed over other's demands. Blood that bleeds out and with it our consciousness passes…on…and returns to…Love.

Can we ever have too much love? Can we truly be ruined by hearing, "I love you" too many times? Do we say it enough? As I focus on expanding love in my heart I feel the pain washing away...

I love you Tanya.
I love you Chris.
I love you Sienna.
I love you sister.
I love you brother.
I love you mother.
I love you father.
I love you grandma.
I love you grandpa.
I love you friend.
I love you buddy.
I love you niece and nephew.
I love you cousin.
I love you mentor.
I love you neighbor.
I love you teacher.
I love you children.
I love you cheerleader.
I love you naysayer.
I love you California.
I love you gulf coast.
I love you America.
I love you Mexico.
I love you George Bush.
I love you Afghanistan.
I love you Iraq.
I love you North Korea.
I love you world.
I love you planet.
I love you cosmos.
I love you Divine Spirit.
I love you Love.

With gratitude and more love.



Suzy said...

I love your writing.


jennifer said...

I love you!

Carrie Wilson Link said...

I love you, too! GREAT post!

Learning Lollipops said...

Tanya! Absolutely loved the whole piece; however the papagraph that speaks of acknowledging our individual body parts and thanking them for serving us really spoke to me. Wonderful!